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You Might Be a Dirtbag If …

You Might Be a Dirtbag If …

You are having the absolute best time of your life, EVER …

The real bums nod at you, as a show of solidarity …

The last time you showered was two weeks ago in a Starbucks bathroom …

You lurk in the cafeteria of a ferry boat waiting for some schmuck to leave his table, then snatch some half-eaten poutine (something that I actually witnessed first-hand last week) …

Instead of studying for a final exam, you’re reading Rock & Ice …

You did laundry sometime last year, and it shows …

You ate a peanut butter sandwitch for breakfast …

You ate a peanut butter sandwich for lunch …

You ate a peanut butter sandwich for dinner …

You cram at least ten buddies into one camping spot to split the cost …

You’re too cheap to pay anything at all for camping so you sleep under a boulder problem …

You check the weather every ten minutes …

You change clothes in a parking lot – like all the time …

Instead of visiting your family in Wisconsin for Christmas, you book it down to Indian Creek …

You find guidebooks more exciting than porn (sure wasn’t like that in high school, was it?) …

The only thing you think about is climbing – EVER …

Your girlfriend says you love climbing more than her (solution: take her climbing) …

The verb ‘to send’ has been magically transformed into a noun in your vocabulary …

You don’t really mind peeing in front of someone …

Pretty much everything you eat or drink emerges from a can …

Your parents say you should get a ‘career’ – and you don’t give a shit …

The outside of your car is so dirty that people write messages on it to communicate with you …

The only thing better than climbing is clean socks …

You live your life one climb at a time …

You would much rather be climbing than reading my stupid blog. Doh!

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About Jesse James

Jesse James is a Canadian rock climber, venture capitalist, futurist, philosopher, technologist, physicist, vegan, social activist, nutrition researcher, adventurer, writer and (sometimes) poet.

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